Ever thought about shooting a sex movie? Ever shot you and your girl/boyfriend while having sex and thought “hmm, this is cool”?
My next book, Shooting Sex, will be a guide on how to shoot your own explicit movie and it’ll be out in 2011…
Until then, here’s a preview of the book and its introduction so you can know more about the project and start thinking about your future creations…
SHOOTING SEX – INTRODUCTION
Already some years went by since I finally succeeded in doing something that I had been obsessed with for quite a time: doing an explicit movie matching my requirements, trying to change the very foundation of conventional porn. The story was called The Good Girl and was about a sexual encounter of a normal girl – could have been one of your friends or even yourself – and the dreamy pizza boy that fulfills all her expectations. I relieved myself from the clichés of porn and started to design my master plan to show the world that a different kind of porn was possible; a cinema with a female touch, with elaborated esthetics and characters with credible motives and real feelings. The Good Girl was a great success career-wise as well as artistically.
Let’s start at the beginning.
Nadine Thornhill is an award winning playwright, actor and spoken word poet. She lives in Ottawa and she is the Program Co-ordinator for Planned Parenthood’s Insight Theatre, a unique non-profit, public education theatre program created by, for and about youth.
Committed to connecting people to their neighborhoods, Apt613 is Ottawa’s digital alter ego, a platform for participation and community building, a place where you can learn and talk about new and exciting people, places, and goings on.
Every last Friday of the month you’ll find the Dirty Laundry sex column on Apt613. Relationships, sex, porn trends, contraception… Nadine talks about everything with a simple, fresh, natural and down-to-earth style. Far from Cosmo’s 10 tips to lose weight, Nadine stays real and provides us with a pleasant and useful column.
Single, in a relationship or even unable to define your “status”, you should check it out.
A while ago I talked about the female gaze and about how real male erotiscism is hard to find… That’s why I would like to share with you some pictures to exercize our female gaze, as a Christmas present…
You’re free to send me your pictures and findings and of course to comment…
You may also submit your creations to XConfessions.com by sending me an email: firstname.lastname@example.org
Enjoy! and Happy Holidays to all!
So from now on, everywhere you go you can take with you a whole guide of the best erotic places in Europe!
On holiday? On a business trip? Or in your house? You can instantly find the erotic places that are closer to you and which will satisfy your needs and expectations according to your mood: nudist beaches, love hotels, erotic boutiques, lingerie, sexy restaurants, art galleries… coming with pictures, descriptions, maps and everything you need to choose the perfect destination for a sensual moment.
I wasn’t sure Apple would accept an erotic app but I was pleasantly surprised to see it on iTunes. The App is worth 4,99€ and of course you need to be at least 17 to download it
Here’s a preview…
What do they have in common? They didn’t think it would get better. And they killed themselves. They were excluded, bullied, degraded, humiliated, even tortured. Why? Because they were gay, or suspected to be gay by their peers. An upcoming term for this seems to be bullycide – and statistics seem to prove that schoolkids being bullied are more likely to commit suicide. They didn’t believe in a positive future anymore, and they didn’t have any support or gay role models showing them that they can get through and that it gets better. After this series of suicides, Dan Savage and his partner Terry created a YouTube video to tell LGBT youth everywhere that it indeed gets better.
According to the NY Times, Dan had the idea after he blogged about the suicides and a reader commented: ‘I wish I could have told you [talking to the boy that killed himself] that things get better.’ Dan felt the same way. He regularly speaks at colleges, but wouldn’t get permission to do so at middle and high schools. But not to leave those kids to ‘parents, preachers and teachers’ who ‘believe they can terrorize gay children out of being gay as they grow up’, he did the first video. Inspired by this initiative, the It gets better project was founded, first on YouTube and later on its own website, after it reached the YouTube video limit in the second week. It’s a worldwide movement against harassment, with 5000 users and more than 15 million views. On the homepage young people can listen to the stories of people who had similar problems, and how – and most importantly THAT it got better, and that they can have the same in their future. People sharing their stories and people seeking help.
There’s a lot of interesting contributions, like for example openly gay lance corporal Wharton from the British military, also a number of celebrities like Janet Jackson. As well as a lot of politicians contributed to the project, even Barack Obama:
Whatever it may be, the only advice is to stick it out, to get through – it will get better. After graduation things will change rapidly, popularity contests, peer pressure, bullying drops off (basically you never have to see the people from school again if you don’t want to), you can leave the small and conservative little town, you can find a working place where you’ll be accepted and you can be yourself openly, you’ll get more independent from your family, and they might even learn to accept it.
Hold out – it gets better!
I’d like to present my brand new initiative: XConfessions.com. It’s a website on which you can share your sexual fantasies, anecdotes, memories… without censorship. Since lately Facebook&co have been censoring everything with a nipple, I felt the need to create a place where everyone could talk about sex, say words like fuck, orgasm, boobs… and have a nice time sharing and reading stories. And it’s completely anonymous so no worries on this side.
Besides, we created a gallery with illustrated confessions featuring designs, pictures and drawings from the Internet. If you want you can even suggest your creations and your findings and send them to me so I can upload them on the website, as long as you give the author’s name (and url if possible).
There are already a few confessions, I hope you’ll help me boost the site up and share your deepest thoughts…
You can also share your favourite confessions on Facebook and Twitter…
So far, which confessions is your favourite?
What can you win?
How to participate?
On December 16th I will personally welcome you at Lust Store in Barcelona for an exclusive sale! (physical shop, not online).
All products will have a 10% discount and if you spend more than 30€ you’ll get the Life Love Lust DVD for free.
There will also be hot wine and ginger biscuits (Swedish tradition).
The event will take place on Thursday, December 16th at
C/ Pujades 74-80
2o 2a B
from 5pm to 10pm
If you would like to come, please RSVP on Facebook
I’ll see you there! And Merry XxXmas!
Here’s a little sample…
Maybe you’ve already been able to appreciate all the erotic and aesthetic content on Geeky Porny Girl… a tumblr web that its author, Amber, aka Lady Porny, updates with lots of quality pictures far from sexual taboos.
To celebrate Geeky Porny Girl‘s one-year-birthday, Amber decided to organize a special design contest which I’m happy to support and spread.
GPG’s Tees Graphic Contest is a design contest which aims at celebrating the creative human spirit through unique designs around sex, glamour, eroticism, joigning design and textile together. Another goal is also to participate in the upcoming opening of an online shop..
So basically everyone can send his/her design until December 25th at midnight. There will be three winners whose names will be announced on January 14th, 2011. Each winner gets one free t-shirt with their own design.
Here’s a preview of all the pics from GeekyPornyGirl
I’m happy to announce that Lust’s new collection or erotic vinyls is out! It’s called Lujuria de Barcelona
What’s a vinyl?
It’s a kind of wall sticker which you can apply on every flat surface like windows, walls, metal, woods, floor…You can remove them when you want without leaving a trace and replace them with a new one according to your inspiration.
These last years people have started to use them at home but at Lust we decided to spice them up and give them a sexy design so that every room of your house, office… get a special atmosphere.
Here are some of the first designs of Lujuria de Barcelona. Under the pictures you’ll also see a video about the whole simple process of applying the vinyls.
The vinyls are already available on Lust Store
All the info + all designs on the official website
Today I’d like to give my opinion and participate in the debate around SuitSupply‘s new series of print ads
Yesterday, the Spanish blog El Divan Rojo mentioned that Facebook censored the ad because of its “inapropriate” images and activated the debate about the legitimacy and meaning of the ad.
I’m really fed up with Facebook’s censorship policy. Facebook is becoming a new puritanic Inquisition and it’s reinforcing taboos we should erradicate: sex is bad – we should’nt talk about sex nor watch sex.
Another topic raised in the debate: sex sells.
Of course it does. And why? because it’s completely inherent to our human nature. Si advertising manages to put sex out there and fight against sexual taboo then fine! However, the way advertizing uses sex often reinforces these cliches of sexual roles in our society (you know, warrior men and passive and anorexic women). This is the reason why I don’t like the Suit Supply ad.
Violet Blue points out: “We have stripped the power-over dynamic from even the days of Mad Men and have taken the eroticism as our own”, and I totally agree with that, however, she adds: “If they find the concept of female sexual submission so offensive — if that is what you read into Suit Supply’s scenarios — they could read Women Who Like to Be Dominated in Bed: Talking to BDSM Submissives and be a little less judgmental about fantasies that might belong to those who would be their allies. Female sexual submission does not mean what it did 20 years ago.”
And I’m not sure this ad is about female fantasies. I think they just used sex as a quick and cheap way to call for people’s attention. If they want to talk about sex, why not create something original, something daring?! Because guys touching boobs is really not original.
To sum it up, I don’t agree with Facebook’s censorship but I don’t want to praise this ad since it doesn’t bring anything new.
It’s like this video:
What does it bring us? It’s just ridiculous and not even funny!
Howerver I love how this ad makes us rethink our mental schemes.
Children’s books are not only one of the first media contacts of a human being in life nowadays, but it’s also one of the first advocates of social norms in society. Children’s books explain norms of class, race and gender, how to handle inner- or interpersonal conflicts and feelings, and they do it appropriately for children.
But primarily: they already convey and suggest proper family concepts. That’s good, it’s supposed to help the child understanding what’s going on in its social sphere, but the way many of them present families, and therefore romantic relationships, gender roles and desires, maybe used to be standard in the 50s, and some seem to pretend that there hasn’t been much innovation since.
Artifacts of antiquated concepts, for our children that will have to cope with the nowadays world – you see the gap? Don’t flap! There’s people working on it…
Sometimes it’s not that something innovative inspires you for your work, sometimes it’s that something is so bad that you can’t wait for anybody else to change it: you have to do it yourself, and you need it to happen right now! That’s my story, and it seems to be the same with the authors of “Unsa Haus”/ “Our House”/ “A Nossa Casa”, a project initiated by Rita Macedo and Ben Böttger, one of the first non-normative children’s books, that I bumped into because I was hinted by an article in the Austrian feminist magazine an.schläge.In the article the authors explain how it all started with questioning why always Mamma Bunny has to bring the tea for the sick Baby Bunny. Cool down ladies and gentlemen, women are allowed to do so, but men are as well, and more and more wish to participate more actively in raising children and do so – and yes, even though they are guys, they do a good job!
Our old-fashioned children’s books don’t even realize the ideas of caring fathers and therefore completely lost touch with social progression. And once and for all: nobody wants to forbid you to live your life traditionally if that’s your choice. But not everybody lives a straight streamlined life like that, and that’s ok – in fact, less and less people decide to live the very traditional roles. Parents get divorced, or maybe never were married, some people have same-sex parents, and not all people, and neither our kids, feel like choosing exclusively from a pool of possible behavioral acts exclusively according to traditional concepts of gender. They not only want to be represented, but it gets more and more necessary to develop concepts to accompany those kids and help them understand and cope with their surroundings and problems.
The family in common children’s books is always the monogamous native-white middle class man-woman relationship with one or two kids, and let me stress that the problem is the ultra-traditional rules that they show between women and men in relationships. It’s less about what you actually live, it’s more about letting live– and still I’d guess that most men and women nowadays already think and live something else than shown in those books. But even beyond gender-roles: if my kids one day find out that traditional coupling or family concept doesn’t feel right for them, or some other concept suits them better, I want them to go for it and not struggle with social condemnation. The authors asked why not make a children’s book where Papa Bunny brings the tea?
Why not a children’s book with two Papa Bunnies?
So within a team they realized a whole children’s book, and NoNo-Verlag published it in German, English and Portuguese. Their children’s book shows another reality of families that you, and our children will come across sooner or later in the world out there, you like it or not! Maybe it’s their own family that it helps them reflect; maybe it’s the neighbors, friends’ families, or ones they see on the street. The experience of the publishers show that usually the kids have no problem at all with the concepts shown in the book, like the same-sex couples – but some of the kids parents have (article in German). And I’d guess they just mask their ideological view and their ignorance with the excuse of just worrying about the children.
This book is a very good sign about the progress in our societies. And it’s only one piece in the line of the publishers of NoNo, one example of their aim to represent marginalized groups and their anti-discrimination project. They also published the “transmasculinities”-calendar, a portrait-calendar for adults showing the diversity of gendered identities beyond the male mainstream, published in English and German.
The next children’s book, “Cäpt’n_Cosmo” will be published in December, but for the present only in German. “Unsa Haus”/”Our House”/ “A Nossa Casa” is available as a free download in German, English and Portuguese. But if you can afford it, consider ordering a printed version. First: it’s easier to read it to your kids. Second: it’s a small contribution to keep non-commercial projects like those running. It’s about perfect appreciation of alternative concepts of families, and about accepting their reality.
It’s a story of peaceful social coexistence. We may not be at that point already…but it gets better!
UPDATE – 10/12/2010: the printed version of the book is only available in German, the versions in English and Portuguese only as download. The title of ‘Cäpt’n Cosmo’ will probably change until the release, which has been postponed to January.
Lelo, founded in Sweden, is the world’s leading designer brand for intimate lifestyle products. You might have already spotted Lelo sextoys on Lust Store like Iris, Lily, Luna or Ina… But starting today you will be able to discover Lelo’s brand new luxury erotic toyline – Insignia.
With Alia, Isla and Soraya, Insignia reflects really well the high standards of the brand unifying elegant designs and the best techniques and materials.
Here’s a sneak peak…
An elegantly playful intimate massager which silently vibrates. It’s couple-friendly, waterproof and ultra smoothe…
A sublimely-crafted mid-size vibrator whose flowing silhouette is contoured to the female form with functions to match, always ensuring the most deeply satisfying sensations.
Beautiful dual-action vibrator, offering multiple pleasures in a sleek and seductive package. Her smooth exterior features individual motors in each pleasure point, and a flexible stimulator that adapts freely for the most luxurious feelings of pleasure.
Personnally I think the designs are really intuitive and adapt perfectly to women’s and men’s desires.
Check for yourself
Today is full of goodies!
First I would like to let you all know that the series of erotic and explicit short movies X-Femmes are now available on LustCinema!
Several female directors with different carreers and visual imaginaries were offered to take the challenge of expressing their personal views on women’s erotic universe. Set out as a series of nine short films, X-Femmes reveals one sex and several real fantasies, played by women and men of flesh and bones who alternate erotic dreams and their daily lives.
Then I would like to talk to you about the first official Tuppersex meeting of my online erotic store: Lust Store. The idea is to gather people around and present new sextoys, talk about the new trends, about pleasure… It’s for Girls and Boys! so guys don’t be shy because there will be stuff for you too!
Besides, we’ll give out free DVDs, wine and exclusive discounts… so if you don’t know what to get your girl/boyfriend for Christmas, you might want to drop by…
It will take place in Barcelona on November 27th at 8pm. It would be great if you could come!
To participate you just need to send your confirmation to email@example.com with your name and phone number and we’ll send you all the details (postal address etc…)
17/11/2010 – Special Edition
I would like everyone to know that Facebook deleted the tuppersex event page despite de lack of offensive images or comments. I am sad to see that Facebook is continueing its censorship policy regardless of freedom and the sexual taboo situation. So if you want to participate in the Tuppersex meeting then just send me an email like it’s explained above.
It’s been a while since we launched Lust Film Fest, a collection of the best free erotic clips that the internet has to offer. In Lust we’re constantly searching for nice sexy videos including videos of men, which is easier said than done…
I’d like to swap places with you for a while, so you can exercize your female gaze, or consider it a little help from my friends…. Let me explain:
We live in a world where men look, and women are being looked at. Yeah, of course there’s some sexy men a woman might gaze at, but speaking about the majority of images, you don’t really want to argue, do you?
When you’re looking for sexy videos with women, it already takes some time to eat the best and stew the rest, but looking for sexy men in videos is like looking for your contact lense on the dance floor of Razzmatazz on a Saturday night.
This observation led me to some thinking…
In general there’s nothing bad about men looking at women. Come on, you’re talking to a sex-positive feminist, not to mention to a pornographer too! But I’ll even dare express it more controversially and say: men objectifying women is ok – but not all the time (for example if a business partner doesn’t take me seriously and only sees me as a sexy object) but leave the straight girls some sexy men to objectify too.
So you might get my point: there’s nothing bad about being objectified, whether you’re a woman or a man, as long as you have the opportunity to gaze back.
>> But back to my problem: finding sexy men <<
Let’s take the “men do something to women” thingy out of the equasion. We are used to looking at women, even women are used to looking at women, and we do it from a straight male perspective, as we got used to those images in tv shows, movies, commercials and music videos day after day. You doubt it? Than just ask yourself two easy questions:
1. How do they try to sell a product for a male target audience? With a sexy woman.
2. How do they try to sell a product for a female target audience? With a sexy woman.
And don’t tell me this simply works best in advertising – the point is that advertisers are like directors, musicians, etc: there are few innovators and many plagiators.
Boys, I don’t wanna take away your images of sexy girls, but you don’t really think straight girls would rather look at sexy girls than sexy boys, do you?
The thing is we freakin’ lack competence to gaze at men from a female perspective. Not because we would not want to, but there’s hardly any images for us to do it. At this point, most female gaze revolutions are fangirl revolutions. Time after time, the most popular examples of female gazing are regularly ridiculed. Like in many images of men being sexy just for the sake of sexiness, we hardly let them without ridiculing the boys for being sexy, or ridiculing the kind of sexiness itself, or the female viewer, remember this viral video?
Making fun of fangirls, one fails to understand their motives. Let’s take ‘Twilight’ – first a lot of guys get it wrong saying the film was bad because the Vampires were too soft – you really think an abusive controll-freak and stalker like Edward is too soft on his girlfriend? Think twice my medieval-friend and watch this video about the wrong and right reasons to hate Twilight:
Meanwhile from a feminist perspective one might criticize the ‘revoltingly sexist passive boy-worshipping of an abusive guy’, forgetting that Bella and her fangirls were not only bitten by a Vampire, but also bitten by the female gaze – I can only add another two or three question marks: why it is so hard to accept viewpoint of the world’s biggest group of people: women.
I’m always up for a good laugh, and of course I’d rather take images of sexy men good-humouredly than not to take them at all. And no, I don’t want to see men only as warriors, fighters, strong and brave policemen, firemen or sailors. There must be some more than those dull ol’ boys. There’s not only one single female gaze, they vary as the desires of the women gazing.
So what next? Prove me wrong! Send me links of your favorite free clips of sexy men that you think can serve a female gaze and go beyond the old “it’s enough if a guy is strong, has muscles, money, status, …” and help the collection grow for the benefit of everybody. Hey guys, you’re invited too, prove to me that boys can have a sexy look too – but I guess you already know me a little and know that I don’t really doubt that you can.
If a clip impresses me, you might find it on Lust Film Fest. But of course all your links posted can be followed and discussed here.
The general topics are sex, health and women, and more precisely, in this issue, you will be able to know more about Alicia Gallottim, writer and journalist specialized in sexuality, and about her new book 69 secrets to enjoy sex. You’ll also get tips, testimonies, news, tours through trendy erotic products and fashions, and more and more!
If you speak Spanish you can read it online for free here
Here’s a sneak peak…
As I was browsing the Internet I discovered this new initiative called the Anti Porn Men Project. So of course, I had to check it out.
It turns out to be, in my opinion, a sincere and genuinely-concerned project in which a group of about 10 men (and more in the future) talk about their use of porn.
Most of them started watching mainstream porn when they were teenagers but ended up spotting the humiliations, the stereotypes, the violence and in the end the harm it can cause many people.
Although I don’t like the “Anti Porn” approach, which I’ll explain later, it’s important to add that the Porn they refer to in their name refers only to the mainstream porn and to avoid confusions they add that they’re “pro-sex”.
Here’s their definition of mainstream porn:
It’s probably useful if we attempt to clarify a little what exactly it is we mean by ‘pornography’.
If you look, you’ll see there are a variety of different definitions of pornography. The ‘porn’ in the ‘Anti Porn Men Project’ is -generally speaking- sexually explicit material that is characterised in some way by cruelty, humiliation, or degradation of women. This kind of material constitutes the vast majority of so-called ‘mainstream pornography’. A definition that we find useful is that pornography is that which ‘sexualizes hierarchy, objectification, submission, and violence’ (Andrea Dworkin).
Of course, porn in itself is not bad, sexual stimulation isn’t bad and learning about our pleasure isn’t either. People can (and they should!) watch porn as long as it doesn’t convey ideas of violence, sexism… So although they clearly explain that their definition applies to mainstream porn only, I think they should call themselves the ProGoodPorn (or something like this…) than AntiPorn which sends the message that ALL porn is bad. We need to send a positive message, that we can make porn better, instead of “going against”, or “anti” or “prohibiting”.
Still, it’s a nice initiative which opens dialogue and debate. Personnally I know many men watch my movies and it makes me really happy. I can’t stress enough that my films are not ONLY for women, they’re open to anyone who wishes to see something different and doesn’t feel satisfied with what they’re used to watching.
The members of the group update the website with news about sex health and porn around the world.
If you wish to participate you can register to write posts or comment the entries.
A special place in a special city.
Salon K is out of time and out of space. A place that is now well-known for its class, its sensuality, its ambiance, its sex appeal…
I love the quote they chose to put on their website:
I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel, Maya Angelou.
It reflects perfectly what you will find in Salon K. Art, dance, acrobatics, literary readings and sensual play with champagne and dessert… Guests sharing conversations with artists from the Stuttgart Ballet, the Cirque du Soleil, the Paris Opera… and entering their world.
This private salon is perfect to enjoy some quality time in a sensual atmosphere.
If you like this kind of events you should definitely check it out – more info on their website
In France they’ve recently passed a law that prohibits the wearing of a burka, this veil many muslim women have to cover their faces with. This law reflects perfectly the conflict between France’s beloved secularism and the principle of freedom.
Many find this law unconstitutional, and two young women decided to take an initiative in order to “dedramatize” the situation. So they’ve been strutting past prime ministerial offices and various government ministries with a black veil but with their long legs naked wearing only tiny shorts and high heels.
“To put a simple burka on would have been too simple. So we asked ourselves: ‘how would the authorities react when faced with women wearing a burka and mini-shorts?” asked the students, one of whom is a Muslim.
“We were not looking to attack or degrade the image of Muslim fundamentalists – each to their own – but rather to question politicians who voted for this law that we consider clearly unconstitutional,” they said.
Their initiative was highly provocative (and genius!) and effectively made people, among them politicians, ill-at-ease so that they would question their reasoning.
This post is not to debate this law in particular but to focus on a powerful individual initiative.
Have a look at the video, it’s really interesting to see how a policeman kindly asks them to leave…
A few months after the release of my latest movie, Life Love Lust, I am now thinking of my next movie called Six Female Voices. It will be a compilation of six short movies (20-25 minutes each) and it will be shot at the beginning of next year.
I was thinking it would be interesting if you could participate! I know many of you who follow my updates like to write erotic stories, so if you have original ideas of texts about women and sexuality, I advise you to write it up (one page more or less) and send me your text to firstname.lastname@example.org
Creativity is no monopoly that’s why I think the result from a collaboration could be great.
If I like it and if it goes well with the general style I will be happy to consider your story and bring it to life with images.
Remember: elegance, sensuality, characters with a background story, originality. I want it to come from your deepest fantasies…