Friday was an awesome day. We did a screening of XConfessions in Filmoteca de Catalunya, a very important public institution ran by the government in Barcelona. They had invited us to open a summer program about movies that had faced censorship, and of course I was thrilled to say yes! But I have to say, showing my work in a respected cinema isn’t the main reason why I was so happy that night. I’ll tell you why.
Screening explicit films on big screens can tell us a lot more about society than one would normally think. Cinemas are places made for us to live shared experiences, and putting sex in that equation isn’t the most normal thing. It can make the viewers face their own fears and judgements – from the moment you buy the ticket until your feelings when you leave the theater. When you are sitting on a chair and you see a cock that on screen has 5 meters, and realize that your arm is sitting only 15cm away from the complete stranger in the seat next to you, your brain can tilt as your mind get lost in questions: Will this scene last much longer? Will this stranger get a boner?Am I making weird faces? Wait, is the stranger’s boner giving me one?
The answer, if I could interrupt the screening to respond, would be “it’s fine if it does!”. Because sex and arousal are normal things that we live with the people that we love the most. Still, we can’t talk about it in public places. Why?
Confirming that an institution so important and relevant in Barcelona’s cultural and historical life like Filmoteca is willing to get in this debate was the biggest joy I could possibly have from the screening. They were brave to open their doors and let me – a feminist pornographer! – in, and bring with me a good amount of close-ups of cunnilingus. That means a lot to me and to everyone who’s working hard in creating new ways on which sex is depicted. I know (because they told me) that the organizers have received a few angry emails from a few pure-at-heart members who couldn’t understand why they had to stoop to the point of adding “libertine actions” to the program, which is even more reason for me to stand up and applaud their initiative. As one of the viewers said before asking his question during the Q&A, Filmoteca was “filled with young people who might have never reached this institution if it wasn’t for tonight” – and, again, I really think this says A LOT about our society.
The house was full – we’ve filled every one of the 360 seats. Plenty of familiar faces, friends, coworkers, performers, and of course the amazing girls from the crew who could finally admire their work within the best conditions of image and sound.
I’ve always dreamed on screening my films in a public event in the city I chose to build my life. In Barcelona I shot my first film over a decade ago, created my very own production company and started XConfessions. It was also in Barcelona that I fell in love and I had two kids. *eyes tearing up*
So here’s a huge thank you to everyone who came to watch, to the organizers from Filmoteca and for every single one of you who collaborate and share your erotic stories in XConfessions!
If you want to organize a screener of XConfessions in your own city, let me know through this form. Let’s spread the love!