This is the next installment of Ask Lust. From sexual health, to porn, to kinks, to filmmaking; you ask, we answer. To get involved, email us at comms@erikalustfilms.com.
Dear Ask Lust,
I’ve realised how much my sexual fantasies and sex life has been influenced by patriarchy. I’m wondering if you’ve any recommendations for ethical/feminist erotic literature and/ or porn to expand my horizons.
– Anna K.
Dear Anna,
Thanks for getting in touch! I know all too well how much our sexual fantasies and interests can be unconsciously influenced by the patriarchal, androcentric society that we are consumed by every day. The first step is to become aware of it, and the next step is to search for alternatives to counteract it. So here we are!
I asked my team to give me their favourite erotic literature and adult film sites. Read on for our recommendations….
Delta of Venus by Anaïs Nin
Delta of Venus is a book of fifteen erotic short stories written from the female perspective and published posthumously in 1977. Nin explores the essence of female sexuality and takes a genre that was dominated by male writers. It’s an especially impressive book when you remember that this was well before the sexual revolution was even brewing.
Bad Behavior by Mary Gaitskill
Mary Gaitskill’s tales of desire and dislocation in 1980s New York caused a sensation with their frank portrayals of men and women’s inner lives. Populated by characters looking for connection in cities late at night, this is a fierce and raw collection of stories about love, sex and obsession.
Forever by Judy Blume
A story of first love, first sex, and first heartbreak, Forever is a story of teenage sexuality and caused controversy when it was published in 1975. Written for teens, it may seem tame now compared to other erotic literature but it is an honest depiction of teenage love that everyone can relate to no matter their age.
The Surrender: An Erotic Memoir by Toni Bentley
This book inspired me to make the XConfessions short film His Was First in my Ass, so I think you can probably guess what it’s about…It’s a witty and eloquent exploration of one woman’s enjoyment of anal sex and submission that may lead you to question your own desires.
The First Bad Man by Miranda July
Cheryl Glickman is the protagonist of this funny and quirky debut novel. She’s a middle-aged single woman who works at a women’s self defence non-profit and fantasises about a relationship with an older board member. Everything changes in her life when her boss’ 19 year old daughter moves into her flat and crashes on her sofa. This is a very funny book that moves from raging sexual obsession and fierce maternal love. Unlike anything else on this list!
Kiss of the Spider Woman by Manuel Puig
Kiss of the Spider Woman is a 1976 novel by Argentine writer Manuel Puig. It consists mostly of dialogue and follows the daily conversations between two cellmates in an Argentine prison, Molina and Valentín, and the intimate bond they form in the process. Sharing the hardships of a six-month prison term, the two eventually forge a strong relationship that is destined to become sexual.
Founded by director Shine Louise Houston, PinkLabel.tv hosts some of the sexiest and most inclusive queer and feminist porn and is a helpful resource for emerging and independent filmmakers looking to enter the porn business. Queer, trans, and people of colour, as well as older people and people with disabilities, are a large part of its community.
Specializing in highly-stylized short films, Four Chambers makes films that are part art project, part erotic cinema. Their beautiful aesthetic subverts the established archetype of what sexuality should be and truly pushes the boundaries of erotic film making.
Lightsouthern’s four-part film Momentum is one of my favourite adult movies. The cinematography, 70s nostalgic storyline, beach landscapes, diverse body types, authentic sex… As the company states, Lightsouthern celebrates people celebrating themselves!
Of course I couldn’t make a list of the top places to watch porn without including my baby ?
XConfessions is the crowdsourced project that I started in 2013 after becoming tired with the same old porn storylines and cliches repeated on a lot of mainstream sites. Users submit their anonymous sexual confessions and fantasies to me, and each month myself and guest directors choose two to turn them into explicit short films. We shoot from the female gaze and everyone’s pleasure matters!
Please share your own book and porn recommendations in the comments & check out the artists whose work annotated this article – Javier Mayoral, Rebecca Dorothy & Polly Nor.
Erika xoxo
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