Do you think about your breath during sex? Do you take long deep breaths? Or do you hold your breath? We don’t usually think about breathing since it comes so naturally to us. But many of us are forgetting to breathe deeply during sex and we could be unknowingly hampering our orgasms by not paying enough attention to it. When I’m directing I often notice that a lot of the performers I work with will use their breath to work up to their orgasms. Whether it’s to delay it, to speed it up, to make it longer or to make it more intense, they know the power of their breath when it comes to sex.
Maximising your breathing helps your circulation which means that more blood flow can go to the genitals and you can awaken sensitive nerve endings. Your muscles contract around your climax and so we often hold our breath or shorten our breath at the same time, but if we can focus on breathing and try to relax these muscles we can experiment with new sensations.
Training yourself to breath deeply during sex can enhance your sexual experience and give you more intense orgasms. Plus, if you have a partner and practice some breathing techniques together it can create a deeper, more harmonious bond between you. It’s also a good technique to try if you are a woman who hasn’t reached orgasm yet. Your breathing is an essential part of your orgasm, so if you want to experiment with new types of orgasm check out my tips below.
Like in yoga when the teachers tells you to breath into certain parts of your body you can try deep breathing and imagine that you’re sending the breath to your genitals. Too often we start shallow breathing around orgasm, but deep breathing can help us achieve deeper, stronger and longer-lasting orgasms. You can start first with masturbating by lying on your back and placing your hand on your belly, as your belly rises imagine the breath being drawn to your genitals, awakening the area and filling it with energy. This will increase the blood flow to your genitals, intensifying your state of arousal.
There is a close connection between the nose and sexual arousal. Nitric oxide is made in large quantities by the sinuses in the nose, so when you inhale through the nose the nitric oxide is taken down to the lungs where it widens the airways and blood vessels. Before sex you can try taking some short quick breaths to build some energy. Sit comfortably and close your eyes. Then inhale and exhale through your nose quickly, aiming for three breaths per second for 15 seconds. Repeat this a few times with a 30 second break in the middle of breathing normally. Then, during sex you can try breathing only through your nose.
You can also try the 4-7-8 breathing technique which is a relaxing pattern developed by Andrew Weil. To do it, find a quiet place to sit or lie down comfortably and exhale all of the air inside you from your mouth. Then, close your lips and inhale silently through your nose for four seconds. Next, hold your breath for seven seconds, before making another audible exhale from your mouth for eight seconds. Practice this pattern for four full breaths.
Practice breathing in sync with your partner before you have sex by staring into each other’s eyes and breathing in sync with each other for 5 minutes. You might feel a bit silly at first, but stick with it and it will end up being a very intimate exercise. You will end up feeling each other’s arousal, creating a deeper connection. Then when you’re having sex you can both make a conscious effort to make your breathing patterns match.
This is a good connecting exercise to try with your partner. Sit down facing eachother, this works particularly well if you are sat in a straddle position, and as one person breathes out, the other person breathes in. Once this starts to feel natural and you settle into a rhythm you can imagine the sexual energy from your partner entering you, and your energy entering them.
When you’re having solo or partnered sex you can try slowing down your breath as you come closer to orgasm. It’s the opposite of what a lot of us do, normally when we’re closer to orgasm we start breathing faster and shorter, or even start to hold our breath. Try breathing slower at this time, it’s best if each inhale and exhale lasts about four seconds, this could delay your orgasm slightly, build up the tension and result in a more satisfying climax.
It’s good to try different techniques to see what your body responds best to. So depending how slowing your breath goes, you can also try speeding up your breath as as you feel your orgasm coming on. See which works best for you. By bringing attention to your breathing you are helping to bring attention to your pelvic floor, allowing you to engage and heighten your sensations so that every touch feels even better. Breathing exercises are another tool to have in your box when it comes to experimenting and having the most pleasurable sex possible.
The XConfessions App[ is a sexual fantasy game for couples who want to discover some new kinks and spice things up in their sex life.
Read what the media says about it:
A game-changer for exploring sexual fantasies [Elite Daily]
XConfessions app helps couples talk about their fantasies [Bustle]
Erika Lust’s new app is making it easier to talk about kinks and fantasies [Dazed]
Available for free on the App store & Google Play NOW!