Why Eva Oh Loves Financial Domination

Ever wondered why some kinks are so popular? Or if you’re the only one getting turned on by that freaky thing you’re doing in bed? Well, question no more because every month a guest from the kink community will take over this column and give us the 411 on their chosen kink. This month International Dominatrix Eva Oh is here to tell us all about financial domination…

Financial Domination aka Findom is the kink where a submissive gives gifts and money to a dominant, often seemingly in return for nothing more than the sexual kick in and of itself. My theory and experience on how this sexual kick occurs has evolved a lot over the years, and it continues to do so. Money and wealth represent so much to our societies, be it security, status, comfort or power. It feeds and homes us, or the lack of it can take these essential needs and therefore our lives away. And so learning to toy with it through power exchange can be a complex process that is sometimes enlightening, dangerous, thrilling and challengingly lustful all at once. For me, exploring financial domination has been both deeply confusing and simultaneously rewarding - but ultimately I believe that it has given me an interesting and valuable way to think deeper about how society values wealth, and the vulnerabilities that we can experience, toy with or distort as a result of that.

I am the dominant on the receiving end of financial domination and for me it started off as a simple but large thrill that I didn’t give too much thought. I had always played with small elements of it throughout my career as a Professional Dominatrix, asking for random gifts both calculated and on a whim. I’d sometimes specify the type of bills that I’d want to receive as payment for my sessions and I’d get my submissives to call it a ‘tribute’ and lay them out at my feet bill by bill. But it was when I first joined Twitter where I saw the striking findom trends that are most popularly known today.

One of these predominant trends on Twitter is the expression ‘Fuck you, Pay Me’, which led me to discover a legion of accounts of the young and beautiful in mostly casual wear sticking up their middle fingers alluringly in their pinned tweets. These FinDom/mes would attach their online payment links to their twitter musings and conduct ‘retweet games’, where their chosen submissive (or ‘paypig’, or ‘wallet’) would need to pay a certain amount per retweet, reply and like. I also found out that they would sell videos or cam sessions where insults, humiliation and orgasm edging and denial were common features. This was all news to me - I had been using financial domination as a gentle addition to my BDSM practice and relationships. And coming across these often brazen, strategic and well branded accounts opened my eyes to the potential lengths that could be had in the eroticisation of money. These women used their beauty, sexuality and creative strategic thinking to toy with desire and money, which in turn triggered the powerful emotions of fear, worth, desperation and elation in their submissives. These emotions are some of my absolute favourites to explore within consensual BDSM - and so I was inspired to see what findom might do for me.

I slowly focused more and more on what the medium of money could do for my own emotional thrills, understanding and needs; and over time I now hold shares in my BDSM slaves companies, I own property purchased by them, and I receive regular tributes for no singular distinguishing reasons. I conduct my tribute ritual more religiously and I’ve added more financial clauses into my BDSM slave contracts. I didn’t end up using ‘Fuck you, Pay Me’, humiliation or edging as a part of how I practice findom - but I approached it rather as a way for me to deepen my everyday connection with my submissives and a way for us to be further integrated into each others lives.

The daily work that my submissives put in at their offices directly impacts my dividends, and each moment their efforts are in my honour. The homes that bring me safety and comfort, bring a deep satisfaction and sense of accomplishment to those who gifted them to me. And in the cases of when submissives hand over all assets, it is a direct relinquishment of control over their own lives, daily expenses and ability to fulfil their basic needs - it places their security and essentially their existence in my hands. For those who crave this ultimate surrender it can be the freedom from being that they have hoped for - and instead, they experience the potential of being mine.