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Why Hiring a Sex Worker is Great for Your Sex Life: Partnered or Single

Why Hiring a Sex Worker is Great for Your Sex Life: Partnered or Single

Kali Sudhra | June 02, 2021 | 5 min. read

It's International Sex Workers Day and Kali Sudhra is here to tell you why you should probably be hiring a sex worker whether you're in a relationship or not. Sit down, read, learn, and then support your local sex worker!

It’s 2021, and sex work has moved to the front of the headlines. Even Beyonce is casually talking about OnlyFans in her lyrics! So what’s all the hype?

I really believe that people are becoming better acquainted with their bodies and connecting to them. Also, there is a growing conversation about sex, moving away from taboos, and embracing our sexuality. It’s actually COOL to be in touch with your own sexual needs, and those of your partner(s). Those needs can be diverse and complex. So why not look to a sex worker to learn a new skill or explore a need? Think of it as hiring a professional to do a consultation. Sex workers do, after all, work with sex for a living. Who better to ask than a sex professional?!

It’s high time to normalize going to a sex worker. If you have a question about your car problems, you go to a mechanic. Legal questions, hire a lawyer. Sex questions, contract the services of a sex worker!

But....seeing a sex worker, isn’t that a dude thing?

It’s a common myth that only men hire sex workers and I can personally demystify this. In my career I have had many women and LGBTQ2S+ clients looking to explore their bodies, learn to masturbate, or just ask questions! Let’s face it, cismen aren’t the only ones with sexual needs and desires! Knowing this, it makes complete sense that there is a diverse population of people who access services.

It also makes total sense that not only singles hire sex workers, but couples do too! I will specifically outline the benefits for singles and couples, but that doesn’t mean that throuples and groups of people can’t benefit from hiring sex workers as well.

What can I see a sex worker for?

If hiring a sex worker solo, you can have one on one time to ask all the questions you want, you can learn about kink, or BDSM. You can explore your fantasies that maybe you were too afraid to try with a partner, building up the confidence to try them one day.

When you hire a sex worker with a partner you can explore threesomes, porn, or learn a new technique together that will definitely bring some heat to your sex life!

If you have always wanted to hire a sex worker but are too shy to work yourself up to meeting in person why not try something online? Also take into consideration the fact that lots of sex workers have been very hard hit by the COVID crisis and may not be seeing clients.

Some suggestions for online services: signing up for someones onlyfan’s page, checking out a cam room, buying porn directly from performers, hiring a private cam session, buying porn from a director/production company that a friend recommended, signing up for conferences or workshops online, taking an e-class about sex or any aspect of sexuality… the possibilities are endless!

Are there any benefits of seeing a sex worker?

There are so many benefits of hiring a sex worker aside from the fact that you are supporting a marginalized occupation, and letting us grow also as professionals. One of the major benefits comes from prioritizing your sexual pleasure and finding a way to re-ignite your sexual drive. It also gives you the opportunity to explore fantasies that you may have had shame about. Plus you can free yourself from sexual shame or body shame that you may have been carrying around and not even knowing it. There are many more benefits, but you will have to hire a professional to find out for yourself! ;)

We often don’t allow ourselves to prioritize our sexual needs and desires, because may be it can be seen as frivolous but it’s not at all this way. It’s the opposite! It’s integral in understanding who we are, how we function and what gets us to that place we want to be at, either alone, or with a partner. When we prioritize our needs, we are taking care of ourselves and our relationship that we have with our sexuality. It’s a basic step in self care!

What to know before hiring a sex worker:

1. Don’t ask us for a discount. You don’t hire a mechanic and at the end of the service ask if he can half his rate for fixing your car. Please don’t come to us asking for charity, we aren’t a non profit whoreganization.

2. Make sure you state in your email your intentions, what you want to explore, fantasies etc. Try to be detailed but also to the point.

3. If you are hiring services with your partner, make sure you have conversations beforehand of what boundaries you have. Thing such as safer sex, consent, which sexual acts you want to explore, etc.

4. Communicate and ask for consent always. Don’t assume because we are sex workers that we are open to everything sexually. We work with sex for a living but have boundaries like anyone else.

5. Enjoy your time together!

So there you have it, many great reasons and tips for hiring a sex worker. Now get on it, prioritize your sexual needs because YOU DESERVE IT!

Kali Sudhra is sex worker, writer and educator born in Tkaronto, unceded Indigenous territory in the settler-colonial state of Canada. She is dedicated to dismantling structures of white supremacy within feminism, and directly challenge gatekeeping o... Read More
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